TFS: Ask Not What You Can Do For Your Country Edition

The important thing to know about this site is that we're here to help. We know you're busy people with things to do -- which is why the staff here does our very best to find and feature the kinds of things that make your day easier. Whether it's a light in the dark, a place to keep your money, or the best way to fix your appliances and small electronics (should it break within a decent distance of 7th avenue).

We also offered you the insane rantings of a madman, a tool that lets you figure out some of the crazy words he used, pictures of criminals (you know -- the gangster controls) so you'll know who to watch out for, and even a ..kind of effective way to try and figure out the name of the song that's stuck in your head might be. All because we know your time is valuable. All because we care.

..None of which seems to matter ever
since you started fucking Matt Damon.

Then again, I suppose it could have been worse.