My Blackberry doesn't work either

For anyone who has pain from their blackberry. Kind of a simple sketch, everyone has thought of the jokes, but the execution from an 80 year old comic pro and an almost cracking up straight man on the BBC has an ineffable quality of comedy.

excerpt from the BBC comedy, The One Ronnie.

Putting Your Finger On It

It's funny 'cause it's true.

Getting It Really Right

Clicking Girl and I love Craig Ferguson. I love Doctor Who. Therefore this weird-ass opening to Ferguson's show with Matt Smith as guest is a glorious tower of win. Extra bonus points for using Orbital's version of the theme music.

Something for Everybody

Despite being a rabid Devo fan, I only recently got their new release Something for Everybody--their first in 20 years. The band continues to kill. See them live if you can. Meanwhile, check out Human Rocket.

Fandom

This guy is remaking the Jonny Quest title sequence in stop-motion animation. The technical term for this is "unbelievably rad."

Looking through different eyes

Portlander Linda Buechler has been creating sly art for more than 30 years. She has started posting some of her work online. Take a look.

Maybe you've been coming on too stroganoff

I'm laughing inappropriately while I should be working... but it's a Friday, so to hell with it! These are just too funny not to share. Some of my personal fav's so far:

Whimpering, not banging.

#8 (sort of) of 8.

Summer Hitz 20XX is also not available online. As a poor substitute, here's the trailer for the festival at which all these short films were presented.

Then God is Seven

#7 of 8, Stargate SG-47719, is not available online. Here's some other weirdness by the artist instead.

Who Wants Six?

#6 of 8: The Unclothed Man in the 35th Century

A friend called Five

#5 of 8: Whose Toes

http://www.animateprojects.org/films/by_date/2010/whose

Too Much Portland

I already worry daily that I'll be deported from this city for not having any tattoos. Now I have to roast my own coffee? Getdafuckouttaheah!

The 100 Best Signs At The Rally To Restore Sanity And/Or Fear

I wasn't there (I bet it was a blast) but as I'm sure many of you have, I've been very interested in the excitement and utterly disappointed by the misconstrued fallout and media's utter inability to even understand what was supposed to be going on, much less how to cover it as a news event.

What I do know though, is that I got a serious kick out of this photo collection of the various signs people brought with them to Rally To Restore Sanity (and/or Fear).

Worth a look, regardless of your affiliation.

Festing

#4 of 8

Definite Trip Material

This is probably seizure-inducing, so consider yourself warned. #3 of 8 from the Floating World Comics Animation Festival in Portland OR.

Jacob Ciocci "The Peace Tape" from Audio Dregs Recordings on Vimeo.

Happy Halloween

I almost sorta hate how cool I think this is.



Marvel at his skill, but I'm pretty sure you don't want to talk politics with the guy.

Continuing the Trip

Here's the second of eight cartoons played at the Floating World Comics Animation Festival in Portland, OR on 10/13/2010.

Apeiron, by Eurico Coelho (1998) from dieubussy (Eastern Mind) on Vimeo.

Taking a Trip

Although I had a ticket, I didn't get to go to the Floating World Comics Animation Festival here in Portland on 10/13/2010. Like many things on which I've had to take a pass (like regular posting to this blog), other priorities interfered.

Still, I managed to sneak a list of the films they played. Here's the first.

What Phish Sounds Like to People Who Don't Like Phish

Look, I'm all about bashing Phish. If someone were to start a political party who's platform included a 95% income tax rate, beating up puppies, and hating on Jam Bands I'd be the first in line to vote for them.

But if you're gonna do a joke, then do a joke no one's heard, ok?



See, this would be funny to me if I hadn't already been versed in the "(Insert Musical Act Name Here) Shreds" meme that we featured on this site many moons ago (you know, back when we used to have time to post updates).

Does this video accurately portray the unmitigated suck that is Phish? Yeah, a little. Personally, I'd actually suggest that as a parody it's simply not annoying enough to paint a clear enough picture of just how much Phish sucks, but beggars can't be choosers, right?

WRONG.

Look, if you're out to kill Jam Bands with a parody video, then you need to look no further than MST3K, who assassinated the Grateful Dead in less than three minutes about 10 years ago.



Fatality. Flawless Victory. Now go get a job, hippie.

The Butch Bakery

Cupcakes. For men.

Because a man eating a cupcake in public is self-conscious about ..eating a cupcake in public?

Sorry, let me try that again.

Butch cakes. Because camouflage is yummy-ummy-licious.

..Perhaps not.

"Formerly an asset backed securities attorney for a major Wall Street law firm, David Arrick's entrepreneurial spirit has taken him on a new path. A cum laude graduate of both New York University and New York Law School, he started Butch Bakery to bring a product to New York City that was completely unique and totally unprecedented. It was time for a bakery company that produced masculine themed products, but stayed far away from the cliche - in other words, Butch Bakery would have no "golf tee" cupcakes, or "baseball" cupcakes, but would have products that guys would love."

I know that sounds like the plot teaser for a new Adam Sandler film, but that's word-for-word copy from the "about us" section of the webpage. And thus, flimsy beard entrepreneurial coup-de-tat Butch Cakes was born.

So get your manly self over to their New York location and in your butchiest voice order one of their signature mancakes such as "The Tailgate,""The Jackhammer," "The Driller," "The Mojito," and of course that one guy who dresses up as the construction worker, who's name I can never remember.


I'm sorry, but there simply aren't enough pictures of Rip Taylor available on the internet to express my feelings about this.

If Superheroes Were Hipsters

As usual, I found everything else funnier than the Joke about Michael Cera.

Facepalm

Ceelo owns me

Must be of age. Not work safe. Has f-bombs and s-words, the n-word. But Cee Lo can sing and it is a message that almost everyone can understand.

Monkeys vs. Iron Maiden

Fight!

5 Gun Myths Everyone Believes (Thanks to Movies)

Fascinating article/list from Cracked -- this time identifying and de-bunking the Hollywood mystique around guns in action films.

I'm fascinated by guns, and yet I'm not really a gun guy -- which is to say that I think they're cool, but I have little actual interest/experience with them physically.

As a result, a lot of these facts came as a surprise to me (a few of them I knew, but lets just say that I'm kinda crushed that silencers apparently don't work the way years of TV and movies had me believing they did).

Enjoy!

Show Me Your Wiener

--via UnMuse, who saw this gem on TV this morning.

Wes Anderson's God of War

Kinda beside the point, but Nosering girl could so get it.

Passive-Aggressive Rogues Gallery

People ask me all the time if I miss New York. Not so much.

The Obameter

How about a little good political news for a change?

None More Awesome

I'm not sure whether to laugh at this or stand up, salute, and applaud. It's a collection of photos of Fantasy Van Murals from a fantastic site called Cyclopeatron.

Yes indeed people, these are the guys your dads used to lose chicks to.



..of course there's a Star Wars one, but if you think that guy was the king of the pack, then you clearly haven't met these dudes yet.




Yes, your eyes do NOT deceive you -- that's an airbrushed Neverending Story van. Or as the ladies call it, the panty dropper.

Seriously, how did this trend ever die?

Jobs of the Damned

We know about the comment spam. The latest spammer trick is to actually hire humans to fill out the Captchas required to comment. I can only imagine what the workers are paid per captcha. Pennies, I would imagine.

If I had a kid and he told me he was a spammer, my only response would be "I have no son."

I saw an ad on Craigslist recently advertising for people to do this. Here. In the United States. Think for a moment about what that means about our economy: We have people so desperate for work they will sign up to be human Captcha machines, at competitive prices with Chinese workers.

So anyway, if someone smart knows how to deal with this, please let us know. Until then, spammers, please prove my point.

Wooden Beats

So here's a video of Steve Averill showing off his latest creation, the Spruce Deuce. It's a robot built out of plywood and model airplane servos -- and it plays the drums.

It does so without complaining about you speeding up or dropping beats. It doesn't scoff at your taste in movies, eat all your food, or insist that you listen to French prog bands.

Needless to say, I am utterly perplexed and confused by this technology.

btw -- there's no way I can post this without including the tag line from the site I first saw this on:

"See Spruce Deuce play in the video below before Neil Peart hunts him down and destroys him to absorb his power. I hear every time Peart absorbs another drummer’s power, he adds one more piece to his drum set."

I don't know if I should laugh or cry

Just when I thought autotune was played out:

This is why I prefer designing for print

I'm not an animator - but I am a designer who occasionally does some character illustrations. Them coming to life is the stuff nightmares are made of... but man is this fun!

AT-AT Day Afternoon

Remember Iron Baby -- the viral short that made the rounds a while back? The same super-talented guy who did that (Patrick Boivin) is behind this awesome little short about the two things he wanted badly when he was a child but never got, all rolled into one.

Enjoy!

How Fast? Sonic Fast!

I can hear the sound of the rings now.

Gasland

I'm quite sure there are videos all over YouTube of people lighting their tap water on fire. But leaving it at that trivializes the problem behind the phenomenon: for those who live near natural gas extraction points that use a water-intensive method called fracking to get at the fuel, there is NATURAL GAS in the FUCKING WATER!

Gasland is a documentary now airing on HBO about the problem. Here's director Josh Fox on The Daily Show putting the problem in context. This feeds right into the US' ongoing water crisis, and is a wasteful and dangerous process that once again points up the need for renewable energy sources.

But it's still pretty cool to watch someone set tap water on fire.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Josh Fox
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

With Sam B., It's a Guarantee

Sample from I Know I Am, But What Are You, by The Daily Show's Samantha Bee: "Are you seriously expecting me to jump off this bridge and restrain an erect dolphin?"

One more, describing the type of call she had to make to 90 year-old patients when she worked at a doctor's office that specialized in ED:

"Hello, Mr. Jacobsen, it's Samantha from the men's clinic."

"HEL-LO?"

"It's SAMANTHA. From the MEN'S CLINIC."

"WHAT IS THIS?"

"SAMANTHA!!!! MEN'S CLINIC."

"WHA-A-AT?"

"CLI-NIC!!!! PENIS CLINIC!!!! YOUR PENIS!!!!"

"APPLE?!"

That Foot In Your Ass Show

Happy Fathers Day, everyone!

OMG CAT RAVE!!1

Not only a bucket of awesome, but also suspiciously similar looking to Satorical's cat -- who now has some serious 'splainin to do.

Drenching. Slaking, Quenching

Every now and then, we actually recommend something useful. Maybe once a year.

Anyway, I'm a distance runner. This is another way of saying I'm reeeeeeeeeally slow. I've run the NYC marathon twice, and am training for my fourth marathon, coming up in September. Besides the races themselves, there are a lot of long training runs involved, and the bottom line is that I end up shuffling my 225-pound ass around for hours. Besides my pole dancing, I also run for long periods of time.

ZING!

Anyway anyway, I've always eschewed carrying water bottles while running because there's usually water available on any given course. I also thought they would be uncomfortable/slosh around/be another two pounds I didn't want to carry for 4+ hours during a marathon. I am also a fan of frugality.

I have learned the error of my ways. I got off my wallet a couple of weeks ago, and I am here to tell you that having water along with you during extended physical activity is the way to go. Even if it's available on the course, not having to stop for water is an enormous psychological advantage. Moreover, some engineering and design folks have been hard at work over the last 25 years.

When I was in high school (Freshman year, 1985, 10:56 two mile), water bottles were something that held about 12oz of liquid (maybe), mainly designed to fit into bicyclists' holders. And YUMMY! Taste that plastic every time you take a swig! Now, runners/walkers may choose from designs tailored to their tastes: if you like carrying your bottle in your hand, there are handstraps available. I wear a belt like the green one pictured. It's easy to get out and replace, carries 20 oz. of water, fits perfectly in the small of my back, and is made so that carcinogens don't leach out with every sip. There are several companies that make this type of thing: Nathan, Amphipod, and Ultimate Direction among them. They all tend to be ergonomically correct, have a pocket or two for keys/money/energy gels/etc.

Then for the no-lies, out-all-day, I'm a thirsty mofo edition, there is Camelbak. It's a friggin' backpack that carries water, up to 100oz.

I may have to train up to carry it, but don't think I'm not up to it. Someday I'll carry an extra six pounds of water around. I'm fierce like that.

Getting Some Perspective

Sure the BP oil disaster is the worst in US history. But how big is it, exactly? Click here to put it in terms you'll understand immediately.

Sexy Celebrities with Ugly Significant Others: A Field Guide

Ladies and Gentlemen, your mission is clear: Become one of these people.

I'm not lovin' it.

I would have thought that an ogre's load would be green. Shows what I know.

Battle of the Bozos

This is what happens when honkies rumble.

"The Battle of the Bozos" Trailer from Bradley Glenn on Vimeo.

Rapping Memes

Do we steer you wrong? Do we? No we do not. The ever-more amazing Martina Fugazzotto, who we love to death, has just come up with yet another winner, as the first entry on Rapping Memes (she also designed the site).

Witness the Cute Times Two as Martina raps to the baby sloth video, then make your own.

Stealing Material

Another Highly Recommended Thing of Several Moments Ago:

MC Chris:

Thanks to Hex for turning me onto this.

Oh, and because people are stupid on the Internet, I'm not suggesting MC Chris stole anything. I'm stealing material from Hex's blog (MC Chris) for this post. Now you know.

Punks Just Got Lucky

SoCal punk stalwarts Bad Religion are thankful for being able to do their thing for 30 years. So they're giving away a free live album. Thanks!

City Limits

Serving a double purpose as both a love letter to one of shows best episodes and an introduction to the show as a whole for those too young to have been there when it was happening -- the Onion's AV Club dedicates an installment of their "A Very Special Episode" series to Mystery Science Theater 3000's viewing of James Earl Jones, and Kim Cattrall in the otherwise forgotten 80's science fiction snoozer "City Limits."

Video clips accompany what sounds strikingly familiar to the memories of almost any avid fan when they talk about the first time they saw the show (btw, my first episode was "Cave Dwellers" -- which I still have on VHS, even though the tape itself is unwatchable after being worn down to almost utter ruin by repeat viewings).

Certainly nothing a lot of us haven't seen before, but still a great read.

Enjoy!

Tenacious D giving the tribute to Ronnie James Dio

resquiat in pacem

Dr. Sketchys Anti-Art School

Dr. Sketchy's Anti-Art School is an international art revolution that takes the form of monthly meetings full of drinking, drawing, & debauchery.

Born from a New York tradition that takes place every other Saturday at The Slipper Room on the Lower East Side -- this unique art "school" has expanded to over 80 cities in 4 continents of the world.

What is it, exactly?

Well -- instead of life-drawing classes where silent students sit in a silent room and draw a bored, oft-uninteresting models -- Dr. Sketchy's offers burlesque performers as subjects, in addition to all sorts of fun including contests, comedic skits, live music, and flashy prizes.

If you're in the Jacksonville area looking for something unique to do on a Wednesday night -- the Jacksonville chapter will be meeting up tonight at LIT downtown (which if you haven't been yet, is all sorts of cool) from 7:30 - 10:30, and will be featuring the Great Jacksonville Fire and in the words of local founder Edward Mourningwood, "one of the 904's most famous of madams, Cora Crane and her brothel, the Hotel de Dream."

Amateurs and pros are both welcome. How could you resist?

Seriously though -- In New York this might be one of many interesting and unique events to choose from, but this is the sort of thing that Jacksonville, Florida is starved for.

The more support something like this gets, the better it is for everyone.

So get out there and have some fun!

Mosquito, Meet Laser

When Bill Gates shifted from tech to philanthropy and disease-fighting, it was only a matter of time before he asked someone to design an anti-mosquito laser shield. Be sure to check the video to see a bug get zapped mid-flight.

Coolness Doesn't Need a Backing Track

The Drummer is Blake Richardson of Between the Buried and Me.
The video is a simple idea that's still pretty cool to watch.

Next up, transparent aluminum

When I was a kid, my grandparents took me to the 1982 World's Fair in Knoxville. Hungary's pavilion that year had a giant Rubik's Cube out front in honor of inventor Erno Rubik. I tasted ultra high temperature (UHT) milk, which is pasteurized in a way that lets it be stored unrefrigerated on a shelf--new at the time. And I stood in line while a specially-reprogrammed automotive assembly robot painted a primitive picture on paper for me.

There's so much proto-tech thrown around at a World's Fair that it's hard to know what's really important at the time. The Rubik's Cube drew my attention then, but its worldly importance over time has not been as big as the robots that now make our cars. Far more important, but less flashy, were touchscreen computers, which were kind of balky, but were the predecessors of today's iPad.

Similarly, it's hard to know exactly how important this "transparent concrete" will be over time, but it's still pretty neat to see a version of what was purely fiction in 1986 when Scotty talked about "transparent aluminum" in Star Trek IV.

We're Gonna Need a Bigger Kid

Hows that old sleeping bag of yours holding up -- Need a new one?
How about that hyperactive child that tosses and turns in his sleep?
How about that chum you've been wanting to take camping with you?

Problem solved.

Rick Moranis Has Some Advice, or Something

The Funk University

Bootsy Collins is starting a university.

Really I don't know why I really need to say anything more than that -- but if you're interested, The Funk University is specifically an online school for Bass Guitar that Bootzilla will be administering himself.

Quoth the Starchild:

"Because a groove is a terrible thing to waste, this sonic learning institution will be unlike anything before, as Professor Collins and the finest bassists in music will unleash an intense curriculum, on the web, for intermediate to advanced funk disciples within the program."

Classes start on July 1, 2010, and will be geared towards intermediate to advanced level bassists.

The guy is a legend, and a hell of a bass player -- so if you've got the time and the interest it's definitely worth a look.

Check it out!

How Bored are You at Work?

Because I guarantee you, these people have got you beat.

What you'll find when you click the link is a collection of fine artwork made from office supplies.

You know that day you took your red sharpies and made the ultimate coffee cup with your name on it?

Yeah. Nice try, poser.

There's a guy here who built a city out of staples. Not just some cityscape, but like a whole hemisphere of stapleopolis.

I have a question -- Where the hell was this guy's boss?

I dare bring a cup of coffee to my desk and the gestapo kicks down the door and hauls me off. This guy steals every staple in the building and no one says a damn thing? Not even the courier from office max with some sort of sarcastic joke?

I call Shenanigans.

Still, some of this stuff is really cool. I hope you didn't need those colored pencils or anything - because Jennifer Maestre used them all to make this while she was surely ignoring your request to approve all those purchase orders you needed done like yesterday.

Henry & Glenn Forever

When I first saw this picture on various tumblr blogs around the web, it made me laugh. But then I find out that it's actually a real indie comic, and it's available right meow (only $4 to get a copy, can't beat that).

Written by the team of Tom Neely, Gin Stevens, Scott Nobles, and Levon Jihanian (better known as Igloo Tornado) -- this comic debuted at the recent Stumptown Comics Fest.

If you've ever wondered (and really, who hasn't?) what it would be like for Henry Rollins and Glenn Danzig to try to make a relationship work while putting up with the shenanigans of their neighbors Hall and Oates, this one is for you.

Crab Revenge.com

So wrong.

So very, very wrong.

EXCLUSIVE: 24: Day 9, via Twitter

Today, May 8th, is the fifth anniversary of this blog. We are very proud on this occasion to offer an exclusive for our readers.

24's television run is coming to an end. It's too bad, too, because creator Joel Surnow had some fantastic cameos planned for next season. Here's a synopsis of what would have been the series premiere for Season 9 (aka Day 9), composed as rough notes in Twitter but never published.

Scene: Washington D.C. Capitol Building spire visible in background. As cars wait at a stop light, Jack Bauer commandeers one at gunpoint.

Bauer gets in the car as its owner watches, stunned, from the median. Before Bauer can drive away, Jason Bourne commandeers the car.

Bourne revs the engine. As he's about to start, John McClane commandeers car at gunpoint. Bourne joins Bauer and the car's owner, who shrugs

McClane revs the engine. Line of cars is now honking behind him as the light has turned green twice. Schwarzenegger steps up with a bazooka.

Daniel Craig, in tuxedo, forces Schwarzenegger out. Arnie joins other carless heroes on the median with bazooka, says "not loaded."

Carless heroes all say "Oh!," as they look wistfully toward the growing collection of guns on the passenger seat.

Daniel Craig gets five feet before coming to a halt. A staff is at his throat. Pull back to reveal Mani from Brotherhood of the Wolf.

Car owner gives a "what the hell?" look, while the carless heroes recognize Mani and are impressed in a movie geek kind of way.

Mani revs the engine once as Roger Moore steps in front of the car. Everyone on the median looks at Daniel Craig.

Daniel Craig holds up his hands in a "I have no idea" gesture as Clint Eastwood walks up. Everyone on the median applauds.

The scene goes Matrix numbers for a second as Neo appears in front of the car. Eastwood says "Oh come ON!" Bauer looks at his watch.

Neo gets behind the wheel. John McClane shouts "You don't even need a car!" Carless heroes nod in agreement. Car owner is on phone with wife

Before Neo can pull away, a yellow GTO screeches in front and transforms into Bumblebee. Cut to Mani, who rolls his eyes.

Roger Moore leans over to Daniel Craig. "Do you think you could get me a cameo or something?" Craig says "Sorry, I don't really handle that"

Several DOT trucks pull up and cordon off the block in preparation for street work. The heroes start to break up. Several pull out phones.

A few heroes ask Bumblebee for a ride. Some amble over to the bus stop and start reading the schedule.

Car owner casually gets back in his car and starts driving. He smiles slightly, wondering what he can get for his new handgun collection.

The Definitive Guide to Telling New Hampshire and Vermont Apart

A point-by-point breakdown of the differences between "America's Quotation Marks." If you stay for nothing else, read until at least the discussion of the State flags. Then again, if you get that far -- why not just finish the whole thing?

Enjoy!

Getting Wood

As you may, or may not know, we're coming up on the 5th anniversary of HRTOTM. And what do you get on your 5th anniversary? Wood!! As the only female blogger on HRTOTM, I hope my fellow bloggers are getting wood right now. Errrrr... ummm... Getting me something MADE out of wood right now... yeah... that's what I meant...

Something like this perhaps?

Sequels to The Human Centipede

I've successfully avoided the torture porn genre so far. Despite a love for good horror movies (Halloween being my favorite), Saw, Hostel, and movies of their sort strike me as a colossal waste of time. The closest I've ever come to seeing something like them was The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which was arguably more scary in its depiction of a relentless killer than from any actual gore in the movie. Only Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf made me cringe more.

Right now the movie getting all the buzz is The Human Centipede. It depicts an insane surgeon on a quest to connect people to each other like the paper doll silhouette in the poster here. It's the type of thing that's twisted enough to think about, but requires a whole extra level of nihilistic cynicism to go ahead and turn into a movie.

Anyway, one problem of the genre is the "porn" part of the equation. Like porn or anything designed to shock the system, viewers/addicts always need a bigger dose. The genre is engaged an arms race to see who can pump out the most depraved and disturbing imagery. The director has already announced his intention to create a sequel involving 12 victims instead of three. But I think we're in for competitors as other studios try to outdo him.

So, coming this Halloween, look out for...

The Human Skeeter

The Human Chigger

The Human Silverfish

The Human Pillbug

The Human No-See-Um

But the smart money will be on The Human Candiru. Starring The Situation as the man transformed by a demented surgeon into a fish that swims up urethras.

Logorama

It's like someone borrowed a simple gag from a Simpson's Halloween episode, expanded it, and then gave it the Michael Bay treatment. I know that might initially sound like a recipe for awful -- but despite it's extreme length, this thing is actually pretty engaging.

And even if it wasn't, the animation is sick.

Enjoy!

-- NSFW language and occasional violent imagery.

friday time-sucks...

i've discovered how i'll spend the last 1.25 hours of my friday work-day... you should too!!

I rock the MashUPs

Too bad I have to link to College Humor here, but so it goes:

Star Wars and Jay-Z

For a Galactic Empire State of Mind...

hipster puppies

One of my favorite new-ish places on the web, hipster puppies never fails to bring a smile (and yes, of course they have a book deal).


The whole site is gold, but here are some of my favorites:

• Wilson
• Mr Noodles
• Zod (for Satorical)
• Daisy
• Noodles
• Max

Good website, here's a snausage.

The Hunt for Gollum

Extraordinarily well made 40 minute film telling the story of Aragorn's hunt for Gollum eluded to by a few lines in the Lord of the Ring. It is "made by enthusiast film makers", apparently on a small budget, but with great results.

http://www.thehuntforgollum.com/watchfilm.htm


I'd embed, but in this case I think it is better if you go check it out there, and the HD doesn't look so hot here in the blog.

SFW Sunday: Sensitive and Sweet Edition

Pretty ladies with pretty voices on a pretty Sunday afternoon. If this doesn't make you sit back and smile a little, you're doing it wrong.

Zooey Deschanel vs Scarlett Johansson in epic folky duo sing-off!! WHO YA GOT?

8 Bit Terrorism Starts at the Home Screen

Turns out that all those hours you spent manning your Atari joystick might come in handy after all.

Michael Buble Being Stalked By A Velociraptor

Just in case you're worried that we might be taking the site in some sort of different direction -- The raptor's name may or may not be Ben Folds.

Ladies and Gentlemen... Once Again... Not Ben Folds

If he keeps makin' em, I'll keep postin' em.

So Yes, This Is Ben Folds

Who remains awesome.

NSFW 'cause of dirty words.

Mimi

It's longish, and it has some strange noises, but it's otherwise safe for work...

... and lovely.

Best New Punk Song in a Long Time

No, This is Not Ben Folds

But he's still pretty awesome.

What if The Golden Girls Were The Wu-Tang Clan?

Great stuff (as usual) from Uproxx -- this time examining the age old question, "If the Golden Girls were actually the Wu-Tang clan, which one would Blanche be?"

Here's the scorecard:

• Dorothy Zbornak as RZA
• Blanche Devereaux as Method Man
• Rose Nylund as GZA
• Sophia Petrillo as Ol’ Dirty Bastard

Bring the pain, indeed.

The Code Organ

This is kinda cool -- type in the URL to your favorite website (I suggest using http://highlyrecommended.blogspot.com/), hit the button -- and a synthesizer program will translate it into music. Synthy-poppy music.

I can't wait until I'm at a more SFW location so I can start feeding some pr0n addresses into this. I can only imagine what those will sound like ;)

Unnecessary Dairy Overlap

As Gristina will happily tell you (he may still even have that book about it) Tessellation is the Tom Sawyer of geometry. Tom Sawyer = Posted.

Six Surefire Ways to Get Lectured by Internet Commenters

While we will occasionally get a good discussion thread happening here at HRToTM, over the years it seems more like our rabid readership is far more content to quietly consider the stuff we put up on our little site and keep their comments to themselves.

As such, we sidestep some of the more annoying trends that accompany sites with more active talkback strings (read: Firsties), but like everyone else on the web -- we're certainly aware of it, and have even probably taken part in a few ourselves.

As a result, I found this particular article really interesting in the ways it discusses the five most common ways that discussion threads almost always veer off track into petty name-calling and arguments -- which I think says a lot about internet culture itself.

And then -- as you should expect, the talkback thread after the post takes the whole thing and runs it into the ground.

Still, good stuff.

See what you think -- and feel free to leave some comments afterward :)

Worst Hip Hop Album covers of ALL TIME

Kanye, Imma let you finish but...

http://www.heavy.com/post/the-20-worst-hip-hop-album-covers-3197

These are some terrible, terrible, bad album covers. I howled laughing.

I think there are some they missed. Please post them in the comments.

Game. Over.

Be still my nerd heart.

Olympic Curling Fever

Oh yes. Olympic Curling and Metal. I can't make this stuff up.

Meep in the Meep

There's apparently a new Muppet Movie in the works, which, if this little viral teaser is any indication -- should be fun.

But until that shows up on the screen, enjoy this perfect snapshot of YouTube culture, brought to you by a couple of old friends.

Axe Cop

Created and written by a 5-year old with help from his 29-year old artist brother -- Axe Cop is all at once awesome and irrefutable proof as to why the imagination of a child is still the best thing in the entire world.

Letters to Your Past

Fourteen Again is a blog of letters written by people to their 14 year-old selves. I've contributed. So should you.

Unhappy Hipsters

Awww, whassamatter? Deathcab not quite as cute as it used to be?

41 Hilarious Science Fair Experiments

Some of these might be a little Photoshopped (the one about DT's certainly is), but the funniest thing about this collection is that you just know most of them aren't.

View from the Top

Here's a view of the House Chamber you didn't get during last night's State of the Union address. Go full screen and play around with it a bit.

The Dramatic Chipmunk Has Had Enough

-via Deus Ex Malcontent

Unintentional Sex.com

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Don't Piss Off The Internet

Mouse over the episodes in the list. Someone's been having fun with tags. The Internet no likey Jay Leno.

Walking On, and Nailing It

It would be really easy for me to overanalyze this one, since I've followed the band for a while, but here's what you need to know: The Walk Ons have a new EP out. The Brookyn-based band has put out five songs that are easy to put into heavy rotation in your head from the first listen.

The songs are all tightly arranged, with a range of styles contributing to the mix, from the Athens sound to Kiss-like backing vocals. My favorite is State of Affairs, which has great guitar work throughout, including a fine solo that doesn't outstay its welcome.

You can listen to all the songs for free right there on the site. You know the drill: Throw the band a few bucks if you like what they're doing.

First-Person Tetris

Love this.

Although the instructions jump on the screen first, if you're anything like me you won't read them and might need a little guidance -- the arrow keys move things left, right, and down -- and the space bar flips things as needed.

The joke is simple and effective, but the effect actually makes for a slightly harder game than usual. Make sure you have a little time to kill with this, because it gets addictive fast.

The Skiff Reader

Super 'friggin cool. Almost makes me want to read a newspaper again.

Pitch-Perfection

Tapping right into the impotent rage-driven psyche of every 8th grader ever, Josh Lieb's I Am A Genius of Unspeakable Evil and I Want To Be Your Class President serves up 300 brisk pages of hilarious middle school politicking. Oliver Watson Junior suffers a daily 400 blows, all while plotting his grand design.

I guess this could be considered a children's book, but it's way funnier (and less immediately familiar and painful) if you're an adult. Click through for a description, but basically Lieb had me at the title.

Two Gentlemen of Lebowski

Youth, thou art entering a world of pain.
We know this document is home-work thine,
And that thou stealest cars and monies,
and this is thy home-work, boy.
Wherefore silence? What impudence is this?
Thou art killing thy father, Laurence! O!
This hath no end; he never will speak word.
I take thy parchment back, and turn to plans
Of secondary contingence. Look well.
Behold thy car, the corvette, crimson-stain’d,
And see what befalls sinners evermore.

[He raises his sword, and smites the car]

This befalleth when thou firk’st a stranger ‘twixt the buttocks, Laurence! Understand’st thou? Dost thou attend me? Seest thou what happens, Laurence? Seest thou what happens, Laurence? Seest thou what happens, Laurence, when thou firk’st a stranger ‘twixt the buttocks?!

This be what befalleth, Laurence! This be what befalleth!!

Nic Cage as Everyone

Perhaps the scariest thing on the entire Internet right now is this site -- wherein wild eyed crazy man Nicholas Cage (or an army of anonymous Photoshop jockeys) takes umbrage with Hollywood, History, and the world at large for not recognizing his talent and casting him as everyone who ever existed.

Seriously, this is the stuff of nightmares.

Creed Shreds

I'm trying to decide if this is hilarious to me because of how much I hate Creed, or if it's just because I'm a musician. The answer is probably somewhere between the two, but whatever the case -- this kills me.

The concept is pretty simple -- take concert/video footage, mimic the movements on the screen, re-dub, and post.

There are actually a bunch of these out there, taking shots at bands and players of almost every genre and style -- but somehow this particular (frequently NSFW) edition is still my favorite.

Enjoy!