Best Fight Scene Ever

To help you ramp up for the first leg of your five-day texas death match with the work week, take a look at this gem from Undefeatable, yet another in a line of unintentionally hilarious films starring Cynthia Rothrock (seen here as the one-armed master of towel-fu).


(it gets a little graphic and there's lots of shouting, so if you're at the office it's probably best to turn it down a little.)

I swear, every time you think it's starting to wear thin, this clip surprises you by getting even better. In fact, the only thing I think that could possibly improve this scene at all would be for mullet dude to tell the Van-Dammish guy he is his father.

"We'll keep an eye out for you, Stingray!"

Clock

Even though it seems like theres no way Flava Flav could wear it around his neck -- I love stuff like this.

Hairy Mail

When you care enough to send the bear-y best.

The Girls Costume Warehouse

Looking for a place to find that last-second costume? Why don't you head over to the lovely streets of Hackensack, New Jersey and let this pleasant older gentleman help you out.

.

(nsfw -- but fuhgettaboutit, I know a guy!)

RainbowPuke.com

Finally, a site that offers clear answers to anyone who ever wondered why being somewhere over the rainbow is always better than being directly underneath one.

The Nutty Buddy

Ever wonder what pro ballplayers buy with all that money?

Play the video to find out.

Your New Favorite Song

Stop me if you've heard this one:

Three scientists went to the jungle in search of rare butterflies. After a long day they made camp near a river, but while they were sleeping a tribe captured them and put them in a tent. After a while the tribe's cheif enters the tent, walks up to the first scientist and says,

"Death or Unga Bunga?"

The Mark Foley Action Figure

"Meet The Press" action playset sold separately.

Giant Steps

I can't think of a better way to start a morning.

The Cylon Jack-o-Lantern

They were created by man. They evolved. They rebelled. There are many copies. And they have a ..plan?

'Tis the Season

Foamy. Halloween. F Bombs. Gimme some candy.

(nsfw, unless you're working on the set of a Scorsese film).

The Forbidden Crypts of Haunted Music

Wow, talk about a labor of love. A page completely filled to the brim with the weirdness that is the novelty LP. The fact that the page is dedicated largely to Halloween music makes it a timely find, but what I truly love about this is the care the webmaster has put in.

More than just a collection of retro album cover photos -- almost every picture links to a page where you can listen to the individual songs on the album at your lesiure -- In short, this guy has painstakingly digitized his record collection and made it all available for free.

If you have the time and you're looking for tracks to soup up your next Halloween party, dig around in here. Outside of more wacky titles like "Sing Along with Drac" and "At Home With The Munsters," you'll find collections of theme songs from classic horror fare like "Dark Shadows" as well as some truly fun songs from the likes of Rob Zombie, Spike Jones, The Reverend Horton Heat, Southern Culture on the Skids, and Rocket From the Crypt.

Enjoy!

Watching Paint Peel

Actually, this is before that.

Knowing is Half the Battle

..But it doesn't make it any less creepy.

I Love the Yeti

Remember, it's ok to "love" the Yeti, as long as you're not "in love" with the Yeti.

Tasteful Advertising

NewsCorp purchased MySpace a little while back, so you had to expect some more ads would crop up.

I lay this one squarely at the feet of Rupert Murdoch.

OK - Aren't You Gone Yet?

All right OK Go, I'll admit it -- it is a pretty cool video. It's the kind of clip that makes people remember why they liked music videos in the first place. Unfortunatley for you, the video is waaay more memorable than the song itself, which means regardless of your actual potential as a band, MTV's invisible stopwatch has been started and your 15 minutes is quickly ticking away.

Here's the latest 51 seconds to fall.

Euro Disney

(If anyone looks at your screen more than casually, this is NSFW)

"Granddad, why did we invade France?"
"Well boy, our government was led by crazy people then. Some regarded France, with its love of peace, art, and non-microwaved food, to be suspicious and threatening. When the Euro Disney tape went on the Internet, well, that was the last straw."
"So how come the other countries let us get away with it?"
"Well, the British and the Germans hated the French too. Now finish your hamburger and Freedom Within Reason Fries."

Tiny Dinosaur Theory.org

Science that makes sense.

Broadviewgraphics

Retro cool art, clothing, and such.

Pin-up art is always fun, but one of my favorite things about this site are the series of prints made up to look like the covers of old 50's pulp detective novels -- in this case featuring mysteries to be solved by ace detective *snicker snicker* Dick Harden.

Ribaldry aside, there's some very cool stuff here from a very talented artist, and if nothing else the background music is groovy with a capital wowie zow zow.

You're Going to Make it To The Weekend

You've been working with these jerks all week. Sure on Monday you were able to put a happy face and be all Code Monkey about it, but here it is only Thursday morning and you're starting to get the feeling you'll never be rid of them.

If only there was a way to express your anger, you know?



Don't even try to front -- You'll be doing this by lunchtime.

The Q-Unit

A few years back producer/DJ Dangermouse (probably best known these days for his work with Gnarls Barkley) released "The Grey Album" - a unique (and exceptionally cool) mash-up using vocals from Jay-Z's "The Black Album" combined with samples taken exclusively (and unfortunately without permission) from "The White Album" by The Beatles.

And while the idea of mash-ups has been popular ever since, very few albums in that style have found their way to any kind of prominence (probably because most attempts to mix one artists vocal stylings with another's music ranges from the crappy to the downright laughable).

Or at least it seemed that way until The Silence Xperiment came up with Q-Unit -- which mixes the arena rock stylings of Queen with thug rhymes from 50 Cent.

It takes some getting used to and it's definitely not for everyone, but it's a combination that seems to work better than most. Best of all, everything's available free for download from the site for you to check out to your hearts content.

Enjoy!

(Mad love to the Monster for the link)

Bad Brains at CBGB's

By the time you read this the it will most likely be sold out (tickets were still available this morning), but tonight marks the last hardcore/punk show ever to be held at CBGB's.

Opened in 1972, CBGB's was originally intended to feature country and bluegrass acts, but instead became a launching pad for some of the biggest names in American punk rock. After 34 years of original music performances from both known and unsigned acts, the club will be closing the doors on the 315 Bowery location at the end of this month. Shows will continue to the end of the week, culminating Sunday night with a sold-out performance by Patti Smith.

Despite rumors that the club will be re-opening somewhere else in the city (or possibly Las Vegas), it will be a shame to see the place go.

That being said, I can't think of a better way to see things off than with a performance by legendary reggae/punk rockers Bad Brains (who just happen to be one of my all-time favorite bands).

Here's a little sample of what we'll be missing:

Metal by Numbers

Scathingly on-target song explaining exactly what's missing from today's so-called "metal bands" sung by the balding old guy you're always surprised to see hanging out at rock and roll shows.

No not me, the other one -- Brian Posehn

The mosh pit scene alone makes this worth watching, but there's plenty of other fun to be had in the form of in-jokes and parodies of some of metals biggest names and cliches.

I'd love to stay and point them
out, but I gotta walk the dogs.

Being A Loser, To Win

We've recommended the freakshow that is competitive eating before, but that was for "normal" foods like hotdogs. Here we have people competing to see who could eat the most jalapeno peppers.

The problem with this type of contest is that everyone loses, especially those in the audience.

Making Stuff Up

This was too good to keep to myself. Here follows Hex's review of Final Fantasy VII.

--

I rented "Final Fantasy VII" on a lark the other day. The animation is stunning. I couldn't even begin to tell you what the plot is, but it's worth a look.

What was fun for me was that the more lost I got in the plot, the more I decided to make my own story up. So if you're interested here's a quick summation of what I decided the story was about:

Members of the emo rock band HIM battle against what appears to be various members of the A-Team, characters from the videogame Street Fighter, and possibly one or two of the guys in Poison for control over the visualization effects that come free when you download the Winamp media player. Then there's some boss motorcycle chases leading up to a battle with a giant monster that sort of looks like the villian from the SAW horror films.

There are also wolves and what look to be pokemon characters, but I haven't figured that part out yet.

--

I think this is a good time to remind people that Hex is actively seeking employment. Although AdSense would probably make both Hex and me instant millionaires, it would also crappify the blog, so that ain't happenin'. So if you've got an opening for a gig, let the man know via the profile link on the upper right side of the page.

Dissing Lorne Greene

Sure, I like the show too - but c'mon, what did Ben Cartwright ever do to deserve treatment like this?

Starts out fun and then (as you fully expect) it turns into a commercial. Such is the world wide widget these days, but it was either this or "My Pussy is Magic" (nsfw) - and believe me, I did you a favor not putting that one up on your screen.

Turkish Wizard of Oz

If they can do it in Bollywood, they can do it in Turkey. Keep your eyes peeled for the Wicked Witch of the West, who looks like Witchie-Poo with jaundice, rocking a coned hat she decorated while in her Van Halen phase.

Thriller

* In the third century B.C. the Greek philosopher Chrysippus died of laughter after giving his donkey wine, then seeing it attempt to feed on figs.

* It is cited that the Burmese king Nandabayin, in 1599 laughed to death when informed, by a visiting Italian merchant, that Venice was "a free state without a king".

* In 1660, the Scottish aristocrat, polymath and first translator of Rabelais into English, Thomas Urquhart, is said to have died laughing upon hearing that Charles II had taken the throne.

* In 1782, a certain Mrs Fitzherbert is reported to have suffered from an attack of hilarity while she attended a performance of the Beggar's Opera. When Charles Bannister appeared on scene as Peachum, she burst into an uncontrollable laugh so loud that she had to be expelled from the theatre. She laughed continuously all night long and the day after and died early the following day.

..Call 911.

Teleportation

Well, scientists can now beam information from one place to another. Whee. Wake me when this makes visiting Staten Island desirable.

I mean feasible. Sorry. Don't wanna get all science fiction there.

The Leia Hat

Only you could be sew bold.

The Lyrics Plugin

Cool little doodad you can download for Winamp or Windows Media Player that displays lyrics for whatever song you have playing at the moment. A really useful thing to have for those of us who normally subscribe to either of the two major schools of singing along with songs you like but don't know the words to:

The "something-something-something" school

"Come here girl
Go 'head be gone with it
something-something-something
Go 'head be gone with it..."

-or-

The "insert nonsensical gobbeldygook and hope no one notices" trick, which kind of looks like this:

Evil Dead: The Musical

Necronomicon-tastic!

I Have Seen the Face of God

...but now I sorta wish I hadn't

Code Monkey

Considering just how aggressively unemployed I have been lately, I find it sorta strange just how much entertained I am by this song. It's bouncy and happy and I'll probably be sick of it by tomorrow, but for right now it's three minutes of looking busy on a Monday, and even if it was forever ago I can still remember just how valuable that can be.

The Baby Toupee

Buyer beware -- These are not toupees. They are wigs.

See, a wig gives you a hairstyle you wouldn't normally have. Toupees on the other hand are a device used to conceal pattern baldness. Of course, once an infant starts to get insecure about their declining youth and looks they're libel to spend any amount of money on all sorts of snake oil type cures.

It's a shame, really.

So until this company wises up and starts making products like "The Burt Reynolds" or "The Shatner", you're probably better off sticking with that spray-on hair that's been um.. working so well for you lately (no really, you can hardly tell).

Cassette Generator

Have a few fictitious band names floating around in your head? Use this to publish their first cassette. Finally, punk geniuses Team Anarchy can go bigtime.

Find the Bands

The images within this picture represent the names of 74 different bands, ranging from classics like The Rolling Stones to more recent fare like the Scissor Sisters (yes, those are both hints).

From what I can tell the original Virgin Records contest has come and gone, but the challenge still exists for music nerds and bored workers everywhere to test their mettle against what might be one of the most fun marketing ideas to come across the pond in recent memory.

Feel free to post your answers in the comments section, but hurry -- I'm already about halfway through it myself!

When Collective Knowledge Isnt Enough

Every wonder what it's like to have Tourettes syndrome?

This cheap gag might help.

Tralala

Girl group from Brooklyn. Boys play the instruments. S'fun.

Bribery (CONTEST)

It looks like this is going to be the biggest month ever for Highly Recommended, with about 700 unique visitors to the blog. Whee!

Comments have been few and far between, however. That may be because the blog sucked, but I'd prefer to think our readership is a shy lot. It's easier on my ego that way.

ANYway, we are not above bribery to get what we want, so the person with the best comments over the next week will win my copy of the new Tom Warnick CD I've been raving about. "Best" will be determined solely by Hex and me, no appeals allowed, we are the law. Given the rate of comments right now, you could win with one zinger or profound statement. Quality counts over quantity, but five good comments could win out over one stellar one. That's for US to decide. Contest runs for one week, to end at 12:01am EST October 2nd. Get crackin', kids!

IMPORTANT: Please note all comments in THIS post, so that we don't have to hunt through 237 posts to find your gem. You can wait 'til the end of the week if you like, just make sure before 10/2 that you post ONE comment here noting where we need to look to find your comments.

Gamma Bros.

Robotron meets Galaxian. Free.

For those of you born after 1980, it's a mad old school shooter.

For the hipsters out there, it's a vintage retro game by an indie publisher. Also worthwhile on the indie tip: Stick Arena. Now for the hipsters: get off my blog.

Least Competent Criminals

This is late night TV show fodder, which is normally beneath us, but it's too good to pass up. Some doofus with a GTA tatt was arrested for attempted GTA. He blew his getaway by putting the car owner's club onto the steering wheel and locking it. Read that last sentence a hundred times and it still will not make sense.

Updates

This site is the zeitgeist, because there have been new developments regarding our three most recent posts.

WTC
Asked about how they feel about being tenants in the Freedom Tower, government employees say "Oh hell no."

Go
Go is apparently more of a challenge for artificial intelligence than chess.

Tom Warnick
Tom Warnick, whose new CD is well worth your $10, has had some serious health problems. He may well address them in detail on his site at some point. It's my understanding that he's mending, slowly, and we wish him the best of luck on a full recovery.

Painting Invisible Targets

Ok, so we're rebuilding the WTC site. Fine. Naming it the Freedom Tower is a bit over the top, but whatever. Thing is, when you announce that the federal government is going to be the anchor tenant, aren't you kinda asking for it--and not just from foreign terrorists, but homegrown nutjobs as well? The only way it could be more of a dare at this point is if they rented the remaining floors to the Society for Taking Away Charleton Heston's Guns and Drawing Cartoons About Islam.

Extra Added Bonus: The gummint has contracted to rent said space at about 50% above market value. F you, taxpayers.

Go

Having discovered Go at the tender age of 36, I'm now annoying all my friends with this ancient Japanese board game. The rules take a little while to learn, but it's playable to infinity. If you can master the little Java tutorial linked in this post's title, then you're ready to go out and get stomped by Go masters from around the world. This server seems a little easier to use than the Yahoo! Games behemoth.

May I See Some ID?

I've Highly Recommended Tom Warnick before, but oddly, he's not yet bigger than American Idol as promoted by a planet-wide integrated mobile gaming/free dental dam giveaway marketing campaign. This, in spite of lyrics on the first album like "In the Duane Reade of Despair, I am the Chief Clerk." For those outside the Mid-Atlantic, Duane Reade is a big pharmaceutical chain like CVS or Walgreen's. C'mon, how can you not love that?

BUT NOW, the band has a new album out. How's this for a description: They Might Be Giants, after three lifetimes of hangovers and gambling debts, forcing them to sell their electronics and kill one of the Johns.

That's a good thing. Go. Listen.

Mel Gibson Newsgame

Dated, wrong, and funny.

Also, sponsored by The Game Show Network?

Astronauts

Say what you will about the space program, but the people who actually fly in the shuttle and get the work done in outer space are awesome. They are low-key, hypercompetent, passionate geeks, like Jack Bauer on quaaludes.

The latest shuttle mission involved undoing about a hundred bolts while wearing spacesuits. One of the bolts was simply stuck, endangering installation of a $372 million truss and solar array. After two spacewalkers completely kept their cool ("Son of a gun" was the worst expletive used), they used a wrench and a cheat bar to get it unscrewed. When it was all over, one of the crew inside Atlantis said:

“Now there was much rejoicing.”


I find it comforting that the best working scientists in the nation are Monty Python fans.

Remembering

Ok, first of all, I probably should just cease posting altogether, seeing as how Hex's find of Shoes is the funniest goddamn thing I've seen in ages.

Be that as it may, back here in the all-too-real world we've been assaulted by flag-waving 9/11 jive nonstop this week. I saw Bush's helicopter arrive Monday on a helipad near work, then had to listen to happy marching bands the rest of the day. Jarring stuff, all.

One of the largely-forgotten tidbits of 9/11 is that Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson came out shortly after the attacks and laid the blame squarely at the feet of New York City. That's right, our godless ways caused the Almighty to send Osama's minions to kill a bunch of us.

It turns out, though, that he was taken out of context. I just discovered this clarification today.

Shoes

What'd you expect, con-dams?

(these cuss words are three hundred dollars -- nsfw, betch)

Justice

There are disadvantages to living in New York City. Worse than the risk of any violent crime, driving, psychotically expensive rents, or having your death be the constant subject of Osama's wet dreams, is the noise. Now, there are hardcore assholes, mostly trust fund party kids, who will tell you that if it's too loud for you to just move out of the city. The rest of us have day jobs, and the constant aural assault makes earplugs one of the first things you buy after moving to Noo Yawk. Some people even wear earplugs on the subway, because the less of your day you spend exposed to jetplane decibel-levels, the better. No foolin', this city is LOUD, and it simply does not stop at any hour, unless it's just snowed on a holiday weekend. Any other time is a pellmell of buses, garbage trucks, car alarms, Mister Softee trucks (fuckers), boom cars, car services ringing the "Brooklyn Doorbell" (car horns), and worst of all: shout-outs in the street. Shout-outs are annoying enough in the middle of the day, but when two people are having a conversation at top volume from different sides of the street at 3am, the most kindly thought you have is calling the cops. The rest of your thoughts involve bloodletting.

Enter this. I'm not suggesting you use stainless steel shot, but frozen blueberries delivered via slingshot and laser sighting are completely appropriate for use on drunkards who don't understand how to leave a bar or club quietly. If you want to party down and make some noise, pay a cover charge and hit the party hiz-ouse of your choice. Otherwise, you are fair game for some blueberry-flavored justice.

I am the law.

The Tetran

Frequently when I watch anime I get the distinct sensation that my life is somehow incomplete because I am unable to spontaneously produce metaphoric droplets of water on my forehead whenever I feel exasperated.

In fact, it seems downright unfair to me that only pixie-voiced, giant-eyed schoolchildren get the opportunity to mingle with the undead, fight aliens, and have sex with tentacle plants.

Not that The Tetran solves any of these problems, mind you -- but there's something positively Miyazaki-an about the prospect having a small, spiny, neon-colored orb hanging somewhere on your body waiting for a chance to fulfill it's life's wish of wrapping itself up in the cord for your iPod earbuds.

My advice is to get yours now before Gwen Stefani
buys them all up and starts writing songs about them.

MySpace for the Granny Games set

This is a social networking site for casual gamers. Having no pictures is a bonus when your target demographic is not quite as comely as the Facebook legions.

Albert Lee

Best Country AND Western you'll hear all day.

Props to N'Drew for the find.

All-Time Top 100 Stars at the Box Office

A while back there was a buzz going on in Hollywood about how the success of The Incredibles was sure to help Samuel L. Jackson finally surpass Harrison Ford as the top grossing box-office star of all-time. And while it's not hard to fathom either of those two men being that successful, I found myself curious as to where these so-called rankings were being kept.

Enter "The Numbers", a movie-industry site that keeps tabs on just about everything connected with the silver screen. Most of the site is dedicated to measuring which film did the best over a given holiday weekend, or who had the biggest opening day -- but if you dig a little deeper you'll find a handful of lists that tell some pretty interesting stories about Hollywood and the people who work in it.

For example, while it's true that Samuel L. Jackson's movies have generated more revenue than Harrison Ford's, that still doesn't make him #1. That honor is held by Frank Welker, whose box office totals over the course of his career cash in at over $4 billon.

For those of you who might not be familiar, Frank Welker is a voice actor who has been working in animation and film since the early 1960's. Probably most recognizable as the voice of Freddy from the Scooby Doo series, Welker has lent his talents to more than 500 television and film projects, making him more like an institution than a star.

Of course, herein lies the basic problem with the list - the idea that anyone associated with a given movie can be given individual credit for it's financial success (which not only accounts for the prominence of voice actors in the list, but also helps to explain the respective statuses of people like John Ratzenburger, Kenny Baker, and Clint Howard).

Bottom line -- next time you catch your kid making funny cartoon voices instead of doing their homework, don't get mad

Get them an agent.

What Right-Wingers See When They Read The New York Times

All the news that's fit to squint at, and then some.

The Sickipedia

In an age of collective wisdom and community thought, it's nice to know that people haven't forgotten that it's the little things that make life worth living.

For example -- deliciously tasteless jokes, organized by category.

An invaluable research aid to those of us who aren't Don Rickles, you'll never have to worry about confusing your Stevie Wonder and Hellen Keller jokes again.

"Cmon, people in the back!"

You know how Louis Armstrong could take any song and make it his own? This is like that, only not in a good way.

Reviewing Crap

The reviewer got far more than $20 of entertainment out of this craptacular MP4 player.

If Emo Ruled The World

Look for the Lego set.

martinamartina

My building must have a "nifty people only" clause, because everyone here is pretty darn spiffy. This is the website for one of my downstairs neighbors, who does a lot of work for gurl.com. I think her comic strips are especially good.

Lotte Reiniger

This German woman created the first full-length feature animated film, The Adventures of Prince Achmed, 11 years before Disney's Snow White. It's available through Netflix--check it out. Working for more than 50 years, she created more than 80 animated films, mostly fairytale or operatic adaptations, with articulated silhouette cutouts. Her detailed figures and backgrounds are truly impressive. Hunt her stuff down and experience some joy.

Mind-Blowing Math

In spite of the Bush Administration's War on Science, it's nice to see some people are still thinking the big thoughts. This is a proof of Poincare's Conjecture.

On second thought, everybody involved here is foreign. Sigh.

Freud Redesigns Gas Cap

Oh, sorry. That's Ford redesigns gas cap.

Heartfelt Political Debate

Joe Redner, Tampa strip club owner, gets a chair thrown at him after picking on a debate opponent's weight.

Boomerang (the object, not the e-mail service)

I pulled my boomerang down off the wall last night for the first time in years, and am really excited about throwing in the park. If you've never done it, I highly recommend it. There's something really satisfing and graceful about throwing a boomerang when done correctly. And if you screw up, chasing it is good exercise.

Remembering Board Games

So a new edition of Monopoly eschews paper money for a credit card for each player. Kids won't know the difference, and will probably wonder why the board is necessary in the first place--isn't this a video game too?

Adults will freak out, even though they're unlikely to have played the game in years, or to do so again in the future.

Wait, why did I post this?

My United States of Whateva

What do you mean this site is the last one to hear about this song?

Well how about this -- I say we're the first.

It's been decided.
- I'm the decider.

The Deuce, You Say

Now see, this bothers me. How did we get stuck with the animated bears and their cutesy smiles while England gets this?

ps - if you're not sure what all the fuss is about, perhaps you need some training.

Zidane, The Game

An inspired quickie newsgame.

Flame Wars

If there's one thing I love better than a good rant, it's seeing jerks shot down in flames. Here's a classic.

The Siren Festival

Hoping to see Art Brut. Also hoping to hit the freak show, if there's time. As Coney Island goes corporate a la Times Square, the longevity of the freakshow will be a big question mark.

Almost forgot: watermelon Italian ices on the boardwalk. Yum!

Helping Out

Ok, nothing funny or weird this time. This is a bit closer to home than our Katrina appeal last year. I know from personal contact that Bryan Holtzapple is a completely worthwhile human being. Please take a look at his site and donate if you can.

500pd. Rubberband Ball vs. Car

I'm guessing the car was already a goner before the experiment.

Minus

Much potential here. Like a female version of Calvin, through a filter of watercolored anime.

Ad Jamming

If you're a gamer, and want to skip the in-game ads served up by Massive Incorporated (even the name is ominous), the bottom of this page has code that will do so. Fight the Power.

Grendel

Dunno if tickets will be available to the hoi polloi, but I recommend anything Julie Taymor ever does. Note: watching the video linked on the upper right side of the page is good for college credit.

Update: tickets are still available, and unlike Taymor's Magic Flute last year, no obnoxious membership or season pass is required. I'm in the cheap seats on the last night of the show.

Belinda Bedekovic

1:29 in on the YouTube vid. Wait for it.

Extreme Ironing

It's one thing to have a silly blog. Not about to start throwing stones here. It's also one thing to run a marathon. I've got a spot in this year's NYC 26.2-miler on November 5th.

It is quite another thing entirely to have a silly blog detailing how someone ran a marathon with an ironing board and iron on his back.

I say this because upping the ante would require carrying a 40lb. bag of potting soil, a trellis, and a Garden Weasel. Although I'm sure Extreme Gardening (especially the full-contact version) awaits claiming by some fool, it ain't me.

Comments

Ok, we're stepping past the 90s and adding comments. Go nuts. Word verification is a pain, but it stops comment spam. Also, comment moderation is on. Don' be a troll, c'homes.

The Ex

Knife holder for those with issues.

Fascism is for Pussies

Terrorists and Virgins

War Over. We Win.

The Gund Gatt

Who you tryin' to get crazy with ese? Don't you know I'm loco?

Many Books You Have

Some days it's all you can do to get to work or class on time.

I mean lets face it, we all want to have fun and sneak out during the summer months, but sometimes you've just got to keep your mind on where you are, and what you're doing.

Playing Hooky.
Calling in sick.

..A Jedi Craves Not These Things

(Mad love to the Monster, who found it first)

Lil Jon Crunk Golf

"From skyscraper roof tops to Times Square, this golf is gangsta."

Seven years later, the question is still relevant: Should the US impose limits on incredibly stupid shit?

Diet Coke and Mentos

You've just got to love it when chemistry gets its show on.

However, much like the American government -- I feel as if these scientists have not yet given enough thought to the weapons potential inherent in this technology.

I mean let's face it -- Super Soakers are expensive.

Therefore, in the name of national security I propose that a massive testing session be held in the immediate future at a local pool, beach, or pub

Who's with me!?

Afterhours

Arena rock meets Radiohead, with bad mustaches. More of a live thing than album bliss, but give it a go.

And by "Gryphon," they mean "Acme."

The Gryphon Single Man Flying Wing is a set of jet engines and a fixed wing you attach to your back while in an airplane. You then jump out of the airplane, fly up to 110 miles, then parachute to the ground.

Please note that by "you," I mean "not me."

Bring Back Britney.com

"We at BringBackBritney.com hold that a hosed-down, scantily clad Britney Spears is vital to the livelihood of millions of Americans. We will not sit silently as she sullies her persona in the public eye; that of a Kabbalah chasing, non-seatbelt wearing, ovary farm for any two-bit backup dancer to take advantage of. This is not the Britney we hold in high regard"

Greg Giraldo 1, Dennis Leary 0

Colin Quinn (who once helped oust Satorical from an episode of MTV's "Remote Control") used to have this show on Comedy Central called "Tough Crowd" where stand-up comedians, semi-celebrities, and the occasional public servant would get together and discuss the issues of the day. Certainly not a new idea (try to imagine Bill Maher's show without all the ...Bill Maher), but occasionally entertaining nonetheless.

The thing that made this show the most interesting for me though was the way that as it began to fade into obscurity the forum became more of a fight club for the comedians involved. Take for example this clip where funnyman Greg Giraldo does his best to set up a joke about the North Korean Nuclear Problem, but then decides instead to basically tear into not-quite-as-funny-as-he-used-to-be-when-he-was-stealing-Bill-Hicks'-material-man Dennis Leary, who does not appear pleased at all to discover that his expensive sunglasses provide less protection than he originally paid for.

Hoffa Cupcakes

Black humor in the heartland.

Cosby Bebop

Some serious dancing for your face.

-- And while I'm at it, don't forget this classic pudding pop from back in the day (NSFW due to excessive filth flarn flarn filth).

We're Not Gonna Take It

Only recently did it dawn on me why my parents objected to me listening to the music created by this group of ...unshaven transvestives from New Jersey.

Not that tunes like "You're Gonna Burn in Hell" or "I Wanna Rock" weren't great for their day, but if you want to dress like Bette Midler, at least do a better job with the rouge.

Still, it's the first guitar solo I ever learned to play -- and regardless of who you are or where you come from, there's no denying the brilliance that is Neidermayer.

Shaveeverywhere

Our grandfathers never had to deal with this, and it wasn't because the electric razor hadn't been invented, either.

The Anti-Hurricane and Tornado Machine

Jeez, even Gore is teeing off now.

A little side note: we've been Highly Recommending stuff for a little over a year now. Starting from nil, we're now getting about 600 visitors a month, so thanks for spreading the word.

Hoaxing Congress

Someone made a parody video game with dialogue from Team America: World Police and passed it off as a terrorist training tool. It ended up being shown to credulous Congressional members in a hearing, who predictably linked video games with terrorism.

Dissing Tom Cruise

No link here, just an observation. A friend of mine who works for HBO is on a list to see various movie premieres. Apparently every female on the list replied that Tom Cruise is crazy and that they no longer have any interest in seeing his movies.

I prefer the term "loonball" to "crazy," but it's the Michael Jackson career effect regardless.

Thank You Stephen Colbert

Colbert annihilates Dubya, sitting three chairs away.